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sybil
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Joined: 13 Dec 2010
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 Posted: Thu Aug 11, 2011 7:00 pm Post subject: Please give me a title |
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Joss broke it.
I am sorry to mislead any of you that I had something else to share.
Sorry.
I do hope there is something "out there" that gives you every happiness.
HUGS!
sybil
Last edited by sybil on Mon Mar 30, 2015 4:13 pm; edited 1 time in total |
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sybil
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Joined: 13 Dec 2010
Posts: 860
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| Posted: Thu Aug 11, 2011 10:59 pm Post subject: |
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Joss broke it.
I am sorry to mislead any of you that I had something else to share.
Sorry.
I do hope there is something "out there" that gives you every happiness.
HUGS!
sybil
Last edited by sybil on Mon Mar 30, 2015 4:14 pm; edited 2 times in total |
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sybil
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Joined: 13 Dec 2010
Posts: 860
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| Posted: Thu Jul 26, 2012 2:53 pm Post subject: Apocalypse |
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Joss broke it.
I am sorry to mislead any of you that I had something else to share.
Sorry.
I do hope there is something "out there" that gives you every happiness.
HUGS!
sybil
Last edited by sybil on Mon Mar 30, 2015 4:14 pm; edited 1 time in total |
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sybil
Oracle
Joined: 13 Dec 2010
Posts: 860
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| Posted: Thu Jul 26, 2012 3:16 pm Post subject: |
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Joss broke it.
I am sorry to mislead any of you that I had something else to share.
Sorry.
I do hope there is something "out there" that gives you every happiness.
HUGS!
sybil
Last edited by sybil on Mon Mar 30, 2015 4:15 pm; edited 1 time in total |
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sybil
Oracle
Joined: 13 Dec 2010
Posts: 860
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| Posted: Thu Oct 18, 2012 3:55 pm Post subject: |
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Joss broke it.
I am sorry to mislead any of you that I had something else to share.
Sorry.
I do hope there is something "out there" that gives you every happiness.
HUGS!
sybil
Last edited by sybil on Mon Mar 30, 2015 4:16 pm; edited 1 time in total |
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Ares
Forum Ghost
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Joined: 06 Jun 2005
Posts: 2476
Location: Australia
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| Posted: Tue Oct 30, 2012 4:53 am Post subject: |
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I'm pleased you found a title that suited your story.
Not having read the comics and only gleaning titbits from reviews posted here and on LJ I have to guess at what has transpired.
My favourite lines in your story?
| Quote: | He was stalling. He hoped time would let him lie in hope a little longer..
Buffy had crossed her arms, her lips pulsing between fury and pain and some question she expected him to mention or answer.
“Tch.. “ she left.
That’s it. Over and out. Roger, wilco. Done. I get it. Not even a real word, but an epic proclamation in a dying declaration. |
Oh. How devastating! "Not even a real word but an epic proclamation in a dying declaration."
This line says it all. It holds a lot of emotion in so few words.
Thank you for your foray into fic writing.
Ares
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sybil
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Joined: 13 Dec 2010
Posts: 860
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| Posted: Sat Nov 17, 2012 6:50 pm Post subject: |
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Joss broke it.
I am sorry to mislead any of you that I had something else to share.
Sorry.
I do hope there is something "out there" that gives you every happiness.
HUGS!
sybil
Last edited by sybil on Mon Mar 30, 2015 4:17 pm; edited 1 time in total |
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Ares
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Location: Australia
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| Posted: Sun Nov 18, 2012 7:54 am Post subject: |
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| Quote: | | Quakers brought ice cream recipes to America. They call themselves a society of friends, but had no problem shunning the world. The stuff sweetened dour folk. They still eat ice cream now, but it wasn’t sinful then. They were sinfully delicious. I ate a lot of them before they came to America. |
I loved these lines. Sinfully delicious. Great Angelus voice.
I'm wondering if the butcher packages that date 1718 that had the ice cream recipe were old and had been left lying about because Liam was born in 1727, wasn't he? And became a vampire in 1753.
Ares
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sybil
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Joined: 13 Dec 2010
Posts: 860
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| Posted: Mon Nov 19, 2012 4:56 pm Post subject: |
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Joss broke it.
I am sorry to mislead any of you that I had something else to share.
Sorry.
I do hope there is something "out there" that gives you every happiness.
HUGS!
sybil
Last edited by sybil on Mon Mar 30, 2015 4:17 pm; edited 1 time in total |
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Ares
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Posts: 2476
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| Posted: Tue Nov 20, 2012 6:04 am Post subject: |
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Thank you for your email via Dark Star.
You know you can email people through the Forum's PM system?
See above where it says 'You have no new messages" Click on that and it will take you to where you can email other members.
And wow! on your explanations. I am very afraid! 
I see you find subtleties in many areas, unlike me who just goes along and thinks simpler thoughts.
And you're right, trust in the reader. They can make up their own minds on how to interpret a story.
Everyone is unique, and that is why writing is such a fabulous art. We contribute in such various ways, which makes it all very interesting, otherwise it would be dead boring. We are all a work in progress.
Hugs
Ares
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sybil
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Joined: 13 Dec 2010
Posts: 860
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| Posted: Fri Nov 30, 2012 4:25 pm Post subject: |
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Joss broke it.
I am sorry to mislead any of you that I had something else to share.
Sorry.
I do hope there is something "out there" that gives you every happiness.
HUGS!
sybil
Last edited by sybil on Mon Mar 30, 2015 4:18 pm; edited 1 time in total |
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Ares
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| Posted: Wed Dec 05, 2012 6:21 am Post subject: |
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*g*
The first line was a very long one, I think you need to carve it up into smaller pieces. Go for impact rather than an overload. And I thought Fred had runonsentences...
It's not a critiscm but just a comment to help you. However, talking of longer sentences, I did love this one.
| Quote: | | The sprightly wobbles of a fever brought a little caravan of dreams: the craven wolf, the hunter’s moon on a bleached bone hung in a sure eye, ribs so gaunt, eating generations couldn’t fill the rack, while tongue drags wide the bottom of the ocean to eat sand and emptiness. |
It's very visual.
And this:
| Quote: | | I looked upon your neck and the thrumming blue trail, heaving and hammering your life blood up and down and around into the vast impossible of you. All the dreams of infinity crammed behind your eyes of green fire, “Drink,” you said. Consuming and consumed, at once, at last, at best. Centuries of heartbeats gut punching me, ratatattat, as they ignored the shadows, laughed and chattered and skittered across my dining table of tomorrow—just shut up. Please: just this. This.. |
If using such wonderfully long sentences is your way of showing the inner thoughts of Angel's demon then yes, you have achieved it. The frantic helter skelter of his mind is spot on.
So ignore what I said earlier...heh!
Sorry I didn't get back to you sooner, IWRY and RL caught up with me.
Ares
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sybil
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Joined: 13 Dec 2010
Posts: 860
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| Posted: Fri Dec 07, 2012 4:10 pm Post subject: |
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Joss broke it.
I am sorry to mislead any of you that I had something else to share.
Sorry.
I do hope there is something "out there" that gives you every happiness.
HUGS!
sybil
Last edited by sybil on Mon Mar 30, 2015 4:20 pm; edited 1 time in total |
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Ares
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Posts: 2476
Location: Australia
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| Posted: Sat Dec 08, 2012 6:06 am Post subject: |
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:~))))
I gather you're not a fan of the comics either. I wonder what gave me that idea?
| Quote: | | While I happen to love “the research,” (and do it because I don’t know where I’ll end up—the reason I could never do an outline until after I wrote the thing out); I discovered the landscape may inform me of emotional meaning, but it also tends to “get in the way” of seeing the characters for all the “stuff.” I think you see why in the previous post of what I see even a name, a word burdened with fate. |
Do I understand from this that you just write, without a thought to a plot or situation, what comes into your mind and then cobble it together?
And what do you mean by outline?
I don't do outlines at all.
I have an idea, a plot, a dream, whatever you want to call it, and then an ending in mind, and I write towards it. I do research, if it's required - it's amazing when you write about a place that one has never visited and receive a review from a reader who lives in that place and who thanks you for your accuracy.
And if by 'stuff' you mean every little detail of a character and their life may get in the way of a storytelling, I do understand what you mean. Sometimes less is more.
Ares
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sybil
Oracle
Joined: 13 Dec 2010
Posts: 860
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| Posted: Mon Dec 10, 2012 4:37 pm Post subject: |
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Joss broke it.
I am sorry to mislead any of you that I had something else to share.
Sorry.
I do hope there is something "out there" that gives you every happiness.
HUGS!
sybil
Last edited by sybil on Mon Mar 30, 2015 4:24 pm; edited 1 time in total |
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